Floyd the Barber

Bell on door clangs, come on in Floyd observes my hairy chin Sit down, chair, don't be afraid Steamed hot towel on my face

I was shaved I was shaved I was shaved

Barney ties me to the chair I can't see, I'm really scared Floyd breathes hard, I hear a zip Pee-pee pressed against my lips

I was shamed I was shamed I was shamed

I sense others in the room Opie, Aunt Bee, I presume They take turns and cut me up I die smothered in Aunt Bee's muff

I was shamed I was ashamed I was shamed